THIS is no ordinary confession by a teenage blogger.

This girl with a pixie face blogged not just about matters of the heart, but also about how she grappled with a life of crime.

At 16, she chalked up two misdeeds - glue abuse and loan-shark running.

After dropping out of school, she spiralled out of control and settled into a lifestyle that included an abortion and self-mutilation.

The girl, who turned 17 last month, is now in reformative training after a district court convicted her of dabbling in loan-sharking activities.

In June, she was arrested by police after she was spotted scrawling 'owe money pay money' messages on the walls of staircase landings to harass debtors at two separate spots.

No friendship

She soon realised the hard truth when her so-called friends didn't stand by her.

She wrote in her blog: (sic) 'Now I realise something. In this world, nothing is call friendship.

'(They) always say 'steady steady. That's it. When I called everyone, all didn't want to bail me. J said he was coming.

'From 12pm I called him. From 12pm I waited till evening 7pm, still no shadow. He is (expletive). He must remember that I always helped him.'

According to the court judgment, Cally (not her real name) and her boyfriend were helping a loan shark to chase debtors at a block of flats in Sengkang.

A resident saw her writing on the wall of the staircase landing with a red marker.

When he questioned her, she ran away.

But as she and her boyfriend sped away on his motorcycle, the resident noted down its number and reported to the police.

They then tracked down the boyfriend.

Two months later, while she was on court bail, Cally was questioned by police officers on foot patrol because she smelt of glue.

When questioned, she admitted she had inhaled glue and was arrested.

In August, she blogged about her first appearance in court, accompanied by her mother and friends.

She wrote: 'I went there at 9am and was nearly late. I waited long for them to call me to step forward.

'They asked me if I wanted to plead guilty. I said no, and said I was going to hire a lawyer. Actually, I didn't plan to hire at all. I just wanted to delay the date I go in.'

In one of her final entries in September, she wrote: 'I am going to court soon. I may not be able to postpone again because today is suppose to be my sentence date.

'I am damn scare I won't be able to see you guys again. I know God has helped me a lot already. But I really don't wish to go in. I am damn lost. I just want a simple life. I regret (what I did). I am so sad.

'I know they care for me, love me and concern about me. But its all useless. I make this a dead end for myself. Sorry to everyone who has cared for me.'

Pleaded guilty

In court, she pleaded guilty to three charges, with another two taken into consideration when District Judge Roy Grenville Neighbour sentenced her to undergo reformative training.

Offenders can be detained between 18 months and three years in a reformative training centre (RTC), with their release dependent on their behaviour.

Cally has begun serving her sentence but is appealing.

She had earlier pleaded to be placed on probation as she had hoped to complete a diploma in hairstyling which she was pursuing.

Her mother is a polio victim and her carpenter father earns about $1,000 a month. They also have a son aged 14.

The probation officer noted that Cally had a history of self-harm and 'the range of methods used to inflict injuries... are alarming and require immediate attention'.

She had dropped out of school following truancy problems and a poor academic record.

She found it difficult to secure full-time employment and could not cope with stress at work or additional responsibilities.

The girl also had an abortion.

District Judge Neighbour noted that the parents, though concerned for her, lacked the vigilance needed to supervise her.

He said they 'have not adequately addressed and grappled' with her 'growing delinquency and association with undesirable peers' despite being aware of the problems.

These factors made her unsuitable for probation as she 'clearly requires a structured and disciplined environment to facilitate her rehabilitation'.

'She also needs close supervision to keep her away from negative peer influences. It is also necessary that she be prevented from inhaling intoxicating substances and physically harming herself,' he added.

Noting that a stint in RTC would be suitable, the judge said: 'RTC will equip her with pro-social thinking and life skills that will address the risk of her re-offending.'

He also felt the use of these positive methods will help her turn to her family for emotional support, rather than to rely on and be influenced by unsavoury friends.





Inside the blog of a troubled youth

THE entries in the girl's blog - Loving You Is My Greatest Happiness - offer a peek into the mind of a troubled teen.

Though it's not clear how she ended up helping the loan shark, she said in her blog that she did it for her boyfriend. But it was all in vain as he later broke up with her.

It appears that the blog was set up two days after their arrest.

29 Jun: The arrest

'Police came to Vivian's house to arrest me... I know we are dead this time. I know you don't want all these to happen. I regretted not (trying) to stop you from being a runner. I know you do this is all because of me, wanted me to have a better life, to have a better living.

'In the lockup room, I cried, not because I was scared but because I was scared I can't see you anymore.'

5 Jul: The regret

'The greatest wish for me in my whole life is to reverse time. If I were to stop you, nothing will happen. It's all my fault. I shouldn't have let you do this job. I am the one who is useless...'

30 Jul: No true friends

'After this police case, I realise no one truly treats me good. Every one in this world betrayed me. Friends seem to betray me. Good friends are inside remand, boyfriend inside jail.'

4 Sep The break-up

On 27 Aug, the second day you came out, we broke up. I tried to ask for a patch. But too bad. You don't want. Do you still love me? Why can't you just tell me the truth? After I go in, I know I can never see you again.

Why are you so cold-blooded to me? You said we can remain as friend and I have changed already. But I never do anything you don't like.

I know you won't be able to see this blog because you don't have Internet. But what matters most is the love from me to you.

lack of parents attention.... this is what lack of affection can cause 1 to be. it's never too late to regret if she finally came to her senses n turn over new leaf before she gets older..

they need to manage their emotion well... LIKE ME

hopefully she come out as a better girl and serve as a good example to our future generation. kids nowadays are